Tip of the Week: Self-Orientation and Trust Go Hand in Hand

Have you ever been in an interview or a meeting with an employer and felt like you were the most important person in the room? You felt valued and heard. Your opinion mattered and you were part of the team. Chances are, your employer had low self-orientation because he or she focused on you and your needs.


photo by o5com

Have you ever had to address an audience and felt your heartbeat rise or your hands begin to tremble? Were you worried about how your presentation would come off? Would people like it or “boo” you out of the building? At that moment in time, you self-orientation was rather high because you were focused on yourself.

Having a high self-orientation does not necessarily mean that you are selfish, but it does mean that you’re going to have difficulty really knowing your clients’ fears, desires, motivations and needs because your mind is littered with self-conscious thoughts.

When you are meeting with a client and focused on yourself, even if it’s just in making sure that you are doing everything “right”, it will be a challenge to understand the needs of your client. People can sense when you’re attention is focused elsewhere and it will affect their trust in you.

I admire those that can go out and be themselves without worrying how others will perceive them. They are outgoing and focused on the person they are speaking with instead of their own insecurities.

In order to be client focused it is important to get past self-doubt and really try to see the client for who they are and what they need. Some people naturally have a low self-orientation while others may need some practice.

Tips to having low self-orientation:

  • Get to know people as individuals
  • Practice good listening skills
  • Find opportunities for informal conversations
  • Connect actions to your words
  • Realize the value of others’ opinions
  • Take Personal Risks

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